That would be an accurate way to describe me. Today, I went to see a psychiatrist, in the hopes of finding out what exactly is wrong with me. Boy, did I get what I wanted!

So, it appears as though I didn't just stop at one disorder, but took a little taste of them all. My newest doctor told me that I am moderately bipolar, which my mom has contended for a LONG time, and now should feel justified in correctly diagnosing! As a matter of fact, perhaps she should start a psychiatric clinic of her own, and hook me up with free therapy! I also have OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder), which I've always known, just didn't think it was worth worrying about. He said it is not too extreme, but it is the disorder and not just obsessive-compulsive traits, b/c I have intrusive thoughts that I can't control and that have nothing to do with the rest of my life (that would make much more sense if I told you how he came to this conclusion, but I'd rather not). Lastly, I'm going tomorrow to get tested to find out if I have ADHD, which he thinks I do. I told him about how I've always turned into an obnoxious jerk in large groups of people, and how I'd like to be normal and seen less like a loud idiot and more like a smart person. That seemed to settle it for him.

On the plus side, my memory is just fine...apple balloon car (he told me to remember those, and then would ask me at random times if I did). He gave me a mood stabilizer, which in time will hopefully get me on track and help me to control my brain. Undoubtedly my days where I can't find the motivation to do anything, followed by my days where I can't stop doing stuff or calm down are depressive and manic phases. Who knew!

So what does this all mean for me? I mean, my life is pretty much alright overall, right? Mostly. What I hope it means is that I will be able to get myself better organized and actually follow through on plans and thoughts. I hope it will help me better control myself in public situations, and people will stop being shocked when they find out I'm not just a loudmouthed freak. I hope it will help me to focus my thoughts more, and make it so I can give my life structure, and successfully homeschool my children! I see lots of positive outcomes from this undertaking, if it works as he said, and as I hope!

Well, I guess I'd better be going now. Trey's waiting on me. We're going to watch Big Love, which promises to be AWESOME this week!

Oh, and one more thing that I just can't get used to. It's still freaking me out! The boy can WALK!