I hate money, I really, really do. I wish I'd never gotten involved in the whole "spending money" thing. Perhaps it would have been wise just to stay living at home w/mom for the rest of my life. It seems to be the in thing to do nowadays. I shoulda done that.

However, since it's too late for that idea to work, we've managed to dig ourselves into a nice, deep, roomy grave of debt. It keeps me up at night (and my mom and Bo, too), it creeps into even the happiest of thoughts during the days, and basically makes sure I don't have a truly good moment w/o it hanging over my head. For a while, it seems like things are going well, and that we're getting on top of things. Then, every once in a while, more and more often lately, it suddenly shows us the truth--that we are so far from in control of things that you might as well say we're in another galaxy from control! I've been doing the selective paying lately, where I decide who's the most important to pay, and how much I actually have to pay them. Don't get me wrong, I pay most of the bills each month, there are just some that come up a little short. We're making just that much too little.

I've been working on getting a new job, a real job, and I'm still waiting to see how that pans out. If I get it, it will help TREMENDOUSLY, as it pays much better than good ol' Pizza Hut, and I won't have to kill my car and pay for gobs of gas. It's a county gov't job, so it takes forever to get through the whole process. I've refrained from finding another job, b/c I feel like if I do, they'll tell me I've gotten the one I'm going for, then I'll have to quit the other one. So, for now, I remain at Pizza Hut, and bitch a lot b/c people suck at dispatching, thus taking money out of my pocket!

Tomorrow my mom and Bo are going to come over and yell at us for all of our stupid spending, and help us figure out what the hell to do w/ourselves. I really hope it gets us somewhere. I've been dying for help for a while now, but no one seems to get just how much I really have no idea what to do w/our finances! Did I ever mention I was never that good at Math?

Anyway, I guess really this is none of your business, but hey, why not tell you, too? It's no secret that I'm a dunce when it comes to money, and I can bet that I'm not alone in this monster of trying to keep up with it all. I've been watching those shows on people who are bad off in debt, and all I've got to say is that we haven't even made a dent compared to some of those people! That makes me feel a little better, but man, do I wish I could get my own problems working the right way! Please wish us luck, and maybe we'll get lucky and find the answer to all our prayers!

Have a great day, and I'll talk to you later!