Wednesday, June 29, 2005
My prayer
Nothing can prepare you for the stress and frustration (I need some new words!) of having a toddler with a newborn. I knew going into this that TJ would get jealous. I knew that he would have to be watched like a hawk around the baby for a while. I knew that he would want and need more attention. What I didn't know was that he would want ALL of my attention, 24 hours a day (and not really care at all if he has Trey's). I didn't know he would turn into a complete ass that has decided that he is going to tell me what to do from now on, and not listen when I tell him what to do. His reply (usually) now to, "Eat your food, TJ." "You eat your food!" He now has to go to time out at least once a day, if not more, for telling me "NO!" when I ask him to do something. He had to go to bed this evening for about an hour because he wouldn't listen, and wouldn't stay in time out. The only reason he got to get up was b/c we felt bad to send him to bed w/o eating first. Tonight he didn't get to read stories w/me b/c he refused to let me change his diaper, and instead went in the kitchen and played and ignored me when I called. I'm working hard on my consistency, and making sure that he gets one warning, then I follow through on the consequences. It's harder than it sounds, and quite challenging at times to be able to follow through. I swear the boy is running at 400 mph, and I'm barely going at 10 mph! I thought for sure that he would calm down today since Trey was here, but no. Trey kept the baby almost the whole day, and TJ demanded me 100% of the time! Oh, I know this was expected, and it's perfectly normal. I know that it will pass, and he will become my precious boy he used to be. I know that my mom right now is reading this and thinking, "She just needs to spank him." I can honestly say that even I, the crusader against spanking, have thought, "Maybe if I just do it once..." I must stick to my guns, though, b/c I know it will work. I have to believe that those people who very rarely spank probably would use it in these circumstances. I can't get over feeling totally guilty for pretty much telling TJ no all day and thinking he must feel like I don't love him anymore. I try desperately to avoid getting upset with him lately, but he's ten times worse now. He even dropped a wooden box on my head today when he was doing something I had just told him not to do! It's funny, though, b/c once I yelled at him for it, he finally left me alone!

So anyway, I feel like this blog has become my outlet for complaining. I promise that hopefully soon it will be more positive again. God, please help me get through this, and please help me make sure I do what's right and have faith. Also, please make TJ act better!

On the flip side, Reese absolutely LOVES Trey! She has spent most of the day wide awake just staring at him. It's really adorable.

Secretly, Trey is madly in love with her, too. Of course, he has to act like the tough guy...

Have a great day! Oh, and I put some interesting articles down below this if you'd like to take a look. Talk to you later!
posted by Christi at 10:56 PM | Permalink |


  • At 11:53 PM, Blogger gina

    spare the rod... LOLOL just kidding. i spanked but so unfrequently- and it did help. or at least i think it did.
    it is time for you to read ( in your spare time!! BA HA) creative correction by lisa welchel. you need fresh ideas it seems.

  • At 1:02 AM, Blogger Kurt

    I want to hear every complaint. Blog on!

  • At 2:13 AM, Blogger susan cox

    blogs are for venting...why else would we take soo much time to read them and write them..if it makes you feel better than do it..

  • At 9:48 AM, Blogger Anvilcloud

    You need to stick to your guns re spanking. You either do it or you don't, but don't change horses in midstream IMO. If timeouts aren't working, follow Dr Phil's advice: find the boy's currency (what he really likes) as use that (very consistently and without relentng) to modify his behaviour. But if you start the battle, you must be prepared too see it through.

    Of course, it's highly probable that I don'tkow what I'm talking about. :)

  • At 4:57 PM, Blogger Tammy

    anvilcloud made a great point. If the time out isn't working. Try taking things away from him that he can't live without. Once he knows you are going to take something away then maybe he will think twice on what he is doing.
    Girl, I went through the samething with Mackenzie. It takes some time for them to get used to the fact that there is another baby who needs your attention.
    It does get better. I will pray for you.

  • At 5:55 PM, Blogger k8

    wow i wasn't gonna post on my blog bc all I feel like doing is whining. thanks to you i feel much better and i may even post something now, whiny as it my be! i miss u sooooooooooo much on the im at night but i know you're busy and now i feel guilty for wanting part of your attention too. i do spank the monkeys if time out doesnt work or if they are doing something that could endanger their life. they are getting bossy too, trying to tell me what to do. never mind instead of commenting here i will just go to my blog and complain like you! kisses! k8

  • At 10:33 PM, Blogger suze

    Complain away!

    I don't spank, but it's funny how effective yelling can be if you yell loud enough. . . Not very proud of it, but you do what you gotta do. Daniel's gotten really bad about not listening, too. And yes, I've spent many a day saying, "No. No. No. No! No! Nnoo! NOO! NNNNNNOOOOOO!" And then turning and gushing all over the baby. I feel awful, but what can you do?

    You are doing great. Things will settle down a bit eventually.

  • At 11:38 PM, Blogger Julia

    I hope your day was a little better. ((((Christi)))) I wish I could be there to give you a real hug.

  • At 9:19 AM, Blogger Brandi

    Ohhh sweetie (((HUGS))) I don't have any advice for you since I still only have the toddler but I am thinking of you and I know it will get better!