Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Not as bad as I thought it would be...
Well, I did it. Today I went w/my brother (and the kids) to my dad's house. I honestly don't know how long it's been since I've talked to or seen him, but it's been no less than two years, as he has never seen Taryn in person, nor did I see him when I was pregnant. I wrote him off a long time ago as someone I don't need in my life. It's a long story, but I felt it was in my best interest, as well as that of my children.

In the past couple of weeks, I have come to find that he has lung cancer, among other debilitating diseases, and has been given not too much longer to live. My sister and older brother, who also had become estranged from him, decided that it was high time to suck it up and take advantage of the time he has left. My little brother was at the point where he wasn't not talking to him, but not really keeping in touch and didn't care too much about it. He decided he needed to go see him, too. I did not come around so easily. I really didn't want to, and only thought I should so that people wouldn't think me totally callous and uncaring about a dying man. It took Trey talking me into going so that I wouldn't look back years from now and regret it (he's always so full of wisdom). Even Mommy said I should probably just go and get it over with.

So, I said okay. My brother was off today, so we got together and just kinda showed up. It went surprising well. Both of us were dreading going, and I was sick to my stomach on the way over. I was pretty shocked that the time there was not that stressful at all. His wife was nice, which was new, and they were actually the most tolerable they have ever been to be around. TJ was insane the whole time, due to a lack of nap. We talked, they told us about all his treatments and the like, and the kids played. It went well. I'd dare say it was almost nice.

Now I'm at a crossroad. I figured I'd make my peace and move on. However, he was all, "Ya'll come by sometime and give me a call." Well, I don't know if I'm ready for that yet. He kept calling himself Pawpaw Jim (I HATE the word Pawpaw), and his wife was Granny Wanda. It just didn't feel right, and I don't know if I'm ready to tell the kids they have another set of grandparents. Now that he's stopped drinking and smoking, he really was quite nice to be around. I'm just perplexed now.

Anyway, I guess that's enough for now. I guess I'll talk to you later. Have a great day!
posted by Christi at 11:16 PM | Permalink |


  • At 1:37 AM, Blogger MiMi

    You can call sometimes and maybe go by every month or two--you don't have to go live with them, but it won't hurt to keep in touch now that it's not so stressful. You'll feel better about yourself in the future... and who knows, you might even get to 'like' your dad.
    Love You!

  • At 9:26 AM, Blogger Julia

    I agree with Mom. I'm glad it went OK. Is Wanda sober now too? If so maybe that's why she was nicer.

  • At 8:50 PM, Blogger Andrew

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  • At 8:52 PM, Blogger Andrew

    Miss Christi,

    It was not easy hanging on that tree at all, OK? And did it look like I was struggling because you didn't say at all?

  • At 10:35 PM, Blogger gina

    yeah wes had a good time too. nice when he is not smoking so much, ya know?

    i am proud of all of you for letting bygones be bygones. life is too short for bitterness or unforgiveness.

    i know he looked bad huh?

  • At 2:58 PM, Blogger Margo

    It sounds like you did the right thing, Christi.

  • At 5:53 PM, Blogger holy chaos

    hugs to you christi...

  • At 9:41 AM, Blogger karla

    Mimi's right--just call once in a while. go by MAYBE if you feel like it. You were nice and made a peace offering, but you're not obligated to embrace the two of them wholeheartedly.

  • At 8:37 AM, Blogger Wesley

    You are awsome for going. I thought he looked pretty good. He shaved his head yesterday because all of his hair is coming out. Keep in touch with him. I refuse to let my Kids call him PAWPAW. WTF is that? They call him Granddad. And Julia calls Wanda "What's Your Name?".