So it's finally Friday. Well, to be honest, it will be Saturday soon for me. I am online right now, b/c I am looking for another job. Yes, I am. I am fed up. The thought of finding another job actually scares and saddens me, b/c I would hate to leave my students. Although they leave me quite regularly when they get parolled, I am sad everytime I lose one. Unfortunately, there's always someone, or someones to replace the lost one. I can't begin to go into why I am fed up, but I do not like the politics of SCDJJ at all.

On a happier note, I started as a faculty sponsor of the 4H club today. That was fun! We are planning a chili cook-off to raise money, and it was my idea! We also visited the butterfly garden they planted last school year (I wasn't involved then). It's pretty cool, if you like plants and stuff. They have basil growing there, and Louisa said we could eat it, so me and one of the boys ate a leaf. Just for your sake, it's not worth it. Kinda, as Richard put it, refreshing. I say it was stingy and icky, though. I do love to season with basil, though. It smelled so nice, too.

Oh, and one of my students today asked me if I'm ADHD. I had to admit to him that I don't know for sure, but lately I've convinced myself that I really am. I am just trying to get the time to set up an appt. with a dr. to find out for sure. It struck me that he asked, though, so I asked him why. He said b/c he is, and b/c I like him. He is very strange, but if you know me, I'm not one who can talk. I think he's amusing. It's kinda sad, though, b/c he is different, and since he's entered the DJJ system, he's tried to commit suicide three times I think. I'll be honest, just knowing stuff like that makes my heart bleed to try to help, but also makes me think I can't do this job much longer. I have way too much compassion for these boys. I've been led to understand that if I want to be successful at DJJ, I must become numb. I can't do that. Oh, but he is so great! He said, "I am different. I like that. I'm unique, but I know that I'm not just like him, or him (as he pointed to the other two boys in the room at the time), and I'm always myself." I tell you, I could have cried right then. He lives by my motto. It just makes me so sad that that will further make his life hard in jail. It's not so cool to be yourself there. I swear, if he was ten years older, not in jail, and lived in Columbia, I would SO be his friend! We would be great friends!

Last word of business....I am NOT going to the birthday party tomorrow. Trey's mom will just have to be mad at me. I have decided that I do not get to spend enough time with TJ as it is, and Sat. are my TJ day. I plan to spend my entire day with him, doing fun stuff. I will not spend it driving for hours, hanging out with people I don't care at all for, and sharing our time with others. If that's stingy of me, then so-be-it. I don't have any questions. My brain has already fallen asleep. Goodnight.